Hi Everyone –
It has been about 4 weeks since my last show and basically I have been eating myself through my emotions. Who knew about this post show depression? I have never experienced it like this– ever. Sure there would a week or two I would feel like I would want to eat everything in sight. But this time I wanted to eat and had moodiness that I could not shake. Feeling lost, confused, frustrated, all the emotions that go with a post show competition. Usually I am able to put things in perspective quite quickly, but it has taken this long for me (since March) to get my feet back under me. Luckily I have great friends (and made some excellent new ones) in the industry who have helped me put everything in a different light, and I am able to re-group and move forward. Thank you all who I have spoken to about this, and I am taking each of your advice.
Lately I have been re-working my routine to take some of the judges suggestions for CBBF Nationals. I think that I have not been putting my best ‘routine’ forward. I need to continually challenge myself to get better. When you do not know your competition (as I do not really know the fitness girls in the CBBF), it is hard to develop a routine. Or at least this is what I find. I knew so many girls in the other federations, that when I saw them at the show you know what they are capable of and how good they are, so you would have to really up your game. CBBF is still to me, and I am still learning the girls.
Physique will always be a challenge for me. I am not a naturally curvy girl. I am a small athletic shape. I will be working hard between now and August 15th to put on my size and shape to my overall physique. I will also be working on posing and my tan – I am never dark enough – anyone else have this issue??
It is 18 weeks till Nationals. I have some ideas, and people that I will using to help me in my prep. I have been doing this for a while, but I feel that I have so much still to learn.
I realized the other day that I will be doing this fitness thing for a few more years. Ok, maybe more than a few. I had my son back in 2006, and I made a comeback. I will probably have another child and then make another comeback. I asked myself what would I do with my extra time that I have if I did not do fitness, and well I could not come up with an answer. Would I always go to the gym? Yes. I love that part. The thing I would miss the most is the routine. Performing the routine is something that I love. So, keeping that in mind, I will probably be around for a while. I am only 32 and have plenty of ideas to keep me going for another decade. Plus I have years and years worth of routines that no one on this side of the fence have ever seen. So, whether the pro card happens this year, or does not I am no longer stressing about it. I have plenty of time to turn pro and compete as a pro, and do well as a pro. Most girls are pushing 40 years, and there is even master divisions, so there is no limit to what direction I can go when choosing to compete. Knowing that I have time on my side, to achieve whatever I set my mind to, gives me great comfort.
A.
Brit-Man
I saw what was said on your site. I know how hard judges must obviously be. They don’t seem to have any set protocol for things like routines styles, length, conditioning requirements.
To some extent people like you will always be prone to inconsistencies in rules and regs, but as you say, there is plenty of time to do what you’re looking to do.
To walk away now, would surely be a big mistake, as you have proven by coming back from childbirth as a champion, and a true winner.
What you want and what is achievable are two and the same.
It seems hard when judges do or say things you probably don’t want to hear, but no matter what is to come, you have already done so much to promote the sport, and be a very, very positive rolemodel to other women, and to your son.
You have shown people what it means to be a woman and sports lady, such as you are and what it means to be someone of excellent human qualities, as you do prove what being human truly is.
You have an remain a true champion in ever sense. You work hard for it, and you deserve to be recognised for the person you are.
Your body isn’t used to achieve gold medals, or trophies that take months and many games / matches to achieve, but it is never the less a beautifully crafted artform, and your achievments are as valid in a sporting sense, as any other sportsperson who acheives top level success.
So to date, your achievements stand alone as unqiue, speical and inspiring, as do you in many ways.
I don’t doubt what your future can bring, and I don’t doubt you can achieve anything you want to.
You were always destined to be at the very top, and it’s been proven time and again.
Sometimes even the greatest can have moments of doubt, and moments of mental weakness, but the truly strong in their field can overcome this without much difficulty, as you will do so yourself.
You are way too good to be consumed by anything that might hinder your future athletic development, and as ever from the pictures I saw, you looked absolutely the epitome of a truly beautiful and artistic Lady athlete.
So GOOD LUCK with all that you continue to do, and never be afraid to doubt or question the whys and wherefores.
You are human, and it is allowed.
There is still much to do, and I know you CAN do it.
🙂 :-).
Matt
Claudine
Allison,
I am NEVER the right color. It bugs me!!!! I would like to know the magic formula… /$%/$%/
For the rest, Allison, you sure are on the right track, and your head at the right place 🙂
Mon corps Mes formes
Bonjour Allison,
You routine are always fun to watch, very well executed and with a lot of nice things.
I love you perspective on the subject. I wish you to get your procard anyway, but to have fun along the way.
have a good prep!
Claudine
Allison,
Long time no write! How is th prep going?
Take Care xxx
deimy
sum times friends aren’t the same when you thought they where