Back to me: Phoenix Pro Wrap Up 2014

On Oct 25 & 26^th, I competed in the Europa IFBB Pro Fitness event held in Phoenix AZ put on my Ed & Betty Pariso/Scott Templeton. It was the last IFBB Pro Fitness show of 2014 and my 60+ shows of my fitness career. After the Arnold Classic in Columbus back in March, I was content to sit back and watch my fellow fitness competitors compete for the rest of the year. I felt burnout from the prep and needed some time to reflect on how I wanted or if I wanted to move forward with competing. Over the last 3 years, I have hired various coaches to help prep me for shows thinking it would help put the ‘spark’ back into my love for fitness; but it did not. I ended up just resenting the process more, and felt boxed in rather than liberated by being guided by someone else. I will post about prepping with coaches in a future update. I have been invited to 4-Arnold’s in Columbus, and each year I finish one placing higher than the year before. That means (and take this very lightly) in about 10 years I will be on track for a win. That is one of many reasons why I needed a break. I could not justify continuing to compete, and not place well. As it is evident that I need some time to improve. Physique is always a work in progress, and I knew I needed to ‘get bigger’, however, routine does count towards 2/3 of the score. I always hope that my routine will bring me up in the rankings, now I see that is my physique that is perhaps holding me back. The Arnold Classic continues to be my favorite show of the year. Just being on THAT stage is a huge accomplishment and privilege. In the beginning I was very much overwhelmed by the energy of the show, as I understood what it meant to be here. I was just ‘happy to be there’ (a very typical Canadian answer I might add). Now my perspective towards competing has changed.  I no longer want to be there anymore just for the fun of it; I actually want to do well. Doing well, in my perspective means placing in those top 5 spots, and ultimately qualifying for the Olympia. Over the last few years, I have been feeling very disconnected from the whole competitive experience. I can do the training, I can do the diet, cardio and work hard for the time necessary to compete, but for the last few shows I have found that once I get to THAT moment of ‘hitting the stage’, I have this overwhelming sense of not wanting to be there. I love training hard for the show, but when it comes time to present it and display all my hard work, I would rather be somewhere else.  It is as though the competitive experience, not the training was something that I did not truly enjoy anymore and I had to question if I should move forward with it anymore. I had to ask myself if competing is something I should step away from? I have said this numerous times over the years that I loved hanging out with the other girls who compete as they were just like me. We [the fitness gals] could always relate to each other. We connect on similar goals, and work ethic. We are a rare species who still choose to do the routine (not the model category). This summer something personal happened that threw me a bit and I felt a little lost. I would never recommend doing a show; to help put you back on track. However, I have been doing this a long time, and if anyone could get their body ready in 7 weeks; I could. I was up for the challenge. This time I felt ready to do this. So, at the last minute I decided to throw my name into the Phoenix lineup. I had a couple of reason for doing Phoenix.

I booked everything in a day as once I commit and make that switch. I am all in. There is no half in. And since I am responsible for all costs I cannot justify the time spent preparing for a show and not bring my best.  Everyone in the gym saw in weeks how my body was changing and I brought intensity to every training session. The sum up the entire event; I had one of the best experiences I had in a long time competing. From the start of the weekend at the athlete meeting to the final day of the expo, I had an awesome time laughing, joking around as I used to, socializing with old friends, meeting new friends, and reminiscing about the past with those individuals who have been doing this for many, many years.   We were all over the place, visiting the expo, taking photos, and just being silly.   This is exactly how I remember my years competing. The fun of it all. Sometimes you can get so wrapped up in the show that you forget about all the other things that go on when it comes to competing. I just needed a refresher, a reminder. I wanted to get back to whom I knew I was a fitness competitor.   Here is my routine, and physique presentations.

Over the last few years, I lost the intensity or desire to win. This prep I brought a winners mindset, and was open to receive the moment when I was in Phoenix. I thought like a champion, make the most of every training, and was prepared to the point where I felt confident hitting the stage in knowing I could not do any better. This was the feeling I needed to experience again. Just to know that I still have the intensity to compete. Luckily the judges liked what they saw. I placed 2^nd in routine, and physique I was middle of the pack that landed me in 6th place. I have work to do on the physique and it is evident to me that I need to take time off to make improvements. I feel I have not progressed physique wise over the last few years. It is frustrating as I feel that I am working hard, however perception is never reality. I will have to be more conscious in my training in the off-season. Although I always train, I am not training with the idea of competing in the back of my mind.

I realize now, over the last few years, I felt pulled in many directions. You can do it all, just not all at the same time. I believe an individual has a finite amount of energy and it needs to be replenished. You cannot keep giving, without take back for yourself. Fitness, at times, can be an energy drain for me, and other times can give me energy where I am able to focus more clearly on those individuals in my life. Family, illness, medical issues, and other various daily life stressors can take that energy you have away, and leave less for other activities. I have found that I still have a love for competing. Just certain times of the year are not good for me, and if my family is not well health wise, competing is just not that important anymore. Essentially my priorities have changed. Also over the last 4 years, I had started my own personal training business, and quit teaching high school full time. My son, who now is 8 years old is a HUGE priority to me, he is involved in many activities. He is in hockey full time with weekly practices and weekends are often filled with tournaments, games or watching games as we have a major junior team in my town.

I have realized that truly finding the balance is a continuous struggle that will change year-to-year, or even week-to-week. I can make goals but not set a goal of achieving them all at the same time. Having friends, especially finding the connection with the other fitness gals is important to me, and if I do not have that, competing is just not worth it. It is the relationships that I have made that keep me coming back year after year. I still have a passion for fitness in ultimately making it to the Olympia. With the points system, and the time of the year the Olympia is held (September), it is possible to achieve this, but for me not optimal. I will be more selective of the shows that I do in the future. Things do not have to be perfect in my life for me to do a show, as I will always be busy, however, the magnitude of the extra stressors, such as illnesses, will determine if I move forward with a show.

I have to Thank Tamee Marie for her awesome choice in suit (I always leave it up to her, as I am not super picky), Elaine Goodlad for her makeup (and our great conversations), Liquid Sun Rayz for their tan, as I received many compliments including those at my gym back home, those individuals at my gym Excellence Fitness for always being there to support me and say a motivational word to keep me on my toes, Rocco Remy for my hair extensions (most of my hair is real but for stage we need to amp it up a bit), and my good friends Sherry Boudreau, Michelle Hickey (photographer) and Deb Haun (videographer), just for being there.

It is amazing how you feel when you have great friends standing beside you to lift you up.

It was an amazing weekend ladies, and I will remember it fondly.

A.